12.14.2008

MAD-libs! Yes, I'm that bored...

Dear Evey,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I'm in love with your dog. I think I realized it when I threw up in your sock drawer in your closet and sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning the pictures from vegas to you, but I'll keep your collectoin of butterflies as a memory.
You should also know that I haven't showered in a month and our friendship is ruined.
Please don't hurt me,
Alicia.

HAHA! This is fun, now do your own!


Dear (someone),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and (4)(5).I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory.
You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name).

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your dog
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - You're mean
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When you smacked my ass
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - when i quoted forest gump
July – when you put cuffs on me
August - When I saw the purple monkey
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When u finally changed ur underwear

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Lasagna- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chr├ętien
Fish - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Carve your initials into
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Put whipped cream on
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
None – My prized statue of Michael Jackson in the nude
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - vexed
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Other - Slutty

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Silly - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Your toe ring
Yellow - The cut toenails
Red - Your Hannah Montanna underwear
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink(ish) - Your love letters to me
Other - The pictures from Vegas

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your collection of butterflies
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbor dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - your virginity
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your glass eye
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Haven’t showered in a month
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F - i hate your cooking
G/H – am better off without you
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Will tell the authorities that you did not steal that whale in the back yard
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Was interviewed about the car you stole
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X- I told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Y/Z-bought tampons from winn dixie

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war
Mineral water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism Is Weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – you should stop picking your nose
Other – Thanks for the Cocaine

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Italy - Warm tingly sensations
Australia - Best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself about the bruise

3 comments:

Evey said...

HAHA! I loved this. I just did it on my blog. Oh and u didnt comment on my post about you visiting AND you still have not posted about Boston. :P

PandA said...

Working on that one today! :)

Linda MacTravel said...

Now this one, on the other hand...I may or may NOT respond to...depends on what color my underwear is ;-) I know...TMI